I learnt one important lesson in my journey. Staying or leaving is not going to solve anything. But searching for the root of the unhappiness will. I found happiness in Ireland, and it has been with me ever since.
On different occasions, staying or leaving has been the question I had to ask myself. “Should I stay or should I go?” like in The Clash song. I am going to share the song here and some thoughts I have about this important question.
When I was 20, my heart made me stay in France for 3 years, while many of my foreign friends left after one year. It was an enriching experience that allow me to be integrated in a different culture and become a little bit French. I welcomed my French self, and by doing so, I became more loving and caring towards my soul. Going beyond one’s nationality has sometimes that potential of bringing you closer to who you truly are inside.
My heart brought me then to Portugal where I had a decent job for a few months, but I got bored so I left it all and move to Ireland. After nearly three years there, I had a stable job at a bank. My position forced me to do things that went against my values and I was constantly suffering in that environment. My soul could not breathe. Once again, my heart asked me to leave my job and left my financial security in order to be at ease. I left with nothing.
Five weeks later, I started to work as a freelance translator for a company that would sustain me for many years after that. Because I could work remotely and my private life was in chaos, I decided to move back to Spain. Life was good. My finances could not be better. I was saving to buy a house, and I knew I could afford it. I was dressed in the latest fashion. I was travelling around and having fun. I was apparently successful and happy, but deep down, I was miserable. Once again, the question came. The Irish man in my life at that time wished to go back to Ireland, so I followed him.
One day, I decided that it was time to stay put and not go anywhere. It was time to embark on an inner journey and eliminate the root of my distress. It was time to make the changes that would make me happy no matter where. Staying or leaving was no longer important. Solving my life became my priority. So many countries. So many faces. So many lives. One important lesson learnt. Staying or leaving is not going to solve anything. But searching for the root of the unhappiness will. I found happiness in Ireland, and it has been with me ever since.